Chewing on Spam

Hey folks! Wuz Happeneen?
The Lexiphage has returned!!!
(pause while the applause dies down)
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Spam has come up in several forms this week. Thusly I share it with you all.
Microsoft is getting on my nerves again, attempting to get me to use their Livemail Beta nonsense. That's just what we need; already most software hits the market chock-full of bugs, errors, and planned obsolescence, now, Microsoft is going to give it to use before it's even been Beta-tested... soon we'll be paying through the nose for software they haven't even invented yet, and once they get their money they won't bother with actually doing the inventing anyway. Kind of sounds like our government...
I have a theory which relates to this.
I noticed that shortly after they started pushing their Theoretical Mail Program Which May One Day Exist on me my regular Hotmail started accepting virtually all of my junk mail as regular mail, forcing me to actually pay attention to the various offers from Viagra suppliers, people who want me to loose weight, and nice women who are so attracted to me they apparently want to have sex with me despite not knowing who the hell I am. Of course, honourable mention here must be made for those fine people who e-mail me several times a day to get me to but an inexpensive replica Rolex watch. For those of you who don't know me, I'd more likely buy a mouthful of AIDS virus than a fake Rolex. Or for that matter, a real Rolex.
My theory is that Microsoft can't push enough of their crappy pre-product on people without starting to sabotage the one which already works (REALLY sounds like our government now!) so they're giving all the spam companies free back-doors into MY e-mail. Bastards!
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The other major Spam issue this week was the trip with my Mum to the Canon Theatre to see Spamalot. For those who haven't seen it, I highly recommend the experience; a high-brow, witty armchair look at history (most especially the Middle Ages), the nature of death, the effectiveness of government, and the plight of the Jews. A good time was had by all, and the audience was moved to sit and chat for a while afterwords due to the powerful, thought-provoking message.
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For those who read the above paragraph, ignore it. Spamalot was a gut-buster, and both Mum and I giggled and tittered for a fair portion of the show. SEE IT! SEE IT NOW!!!!
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Gavin was sick yesterday, and Mya got it last night and still is under the weather (as opposed to on top of it? weird expression...) so I'll probably be trapped indoors today. I'll be googling sites therefore on government-designed bio-weaponry and whether spewing a cottage cheese-like substance all over my couch can be blamed on anyone. I won't talk about it over the phone, though- I've been hearing more of those clicks on the line lately and when Paul phones up from the States I get lots of gaps in the sound which can only mean the CRTC is editing phone conversations now. No doubt soon they'll be doing the same with the web. It's okay, though. As usual they do a crappy job of that, too. It's just like **** * *** ******* **** *** ** ******* ********* *** ***** *** *** ** **** **** **** **** ***** *** **** ** ****... * ***** **** *** ***** ** *** ***** **** *** ** *** ****** * ***** **! ******, don't you think?
I'm sure it's got to be at least four.
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I'm glad I got that out in the open. As long as people put information like that into th public eye, democracy has a chance.
Well, I'll be off now...
Until next time, **** **** ***** ** *** ***!
The ************ Lexiphage.