The Long-Awaited Return of the Sequel
Hello everyone...
Sorry for not posting for so long; apparently the new blogger and my computer do not mix, so I am posting this outside of the Lair until I figure out what to do next. Before I move on, however, let me say that I was, in fact, right to fear change and therefore will continue to do so.
...
The Smurfs are doing well, Gavin is talking even more and enjoys wearing his leather jacket and sneakers in the warmer weather. Mya is talking sporatically, saying things like "Hungry", "No", and "Hi Dad". Mainly still screaming, though. This coming September Mya should be joining Juniour Kindergarten just as Gavin moves on up to Senior Kindergarten (from what I understand this involves old people wearing diapers and eating pureed food, so I'm not sure why Gav needs to be there... but, I digress...). Both are recovering from ear infections, and what stress they suffer as a result they feel comfortable in relieving with methods involving aiming at my head.
...
Against all probability the Neighbour Lady and myself continue to remain not only on speaking terms, but actually as touchy-feely as ever. This flies in the face of conventional thinking, which suggests the only romantic relationship I am qualified for involves cash up front.
...
The Insane Ex is once again in the hospital after showing up at my door in defiance of court order under the impression she was going to move in or something. Being fond of sleeping without one eye open, I politely refused and arranged an exchange of ideas between her and the police.
...
McGuinty is up to his usual tricks, his sneaky budgets openly allocating budgets towards the treatment of Autistic children whilst covertly scooping the same funds into the Liberal election coffers. Don't worry, though- despite the fact that there are laws preventing this sort of thing, it isn't really illegal because the government is doing it. An update on the waiting list for IBI therapy- when the liberals took office there was a wait list of 78 children for this program... Since then, despite McGuinty's followers pretending to throw money at the problem, the same list numbers over 1000. That's right, 1000. I'm not making this up, people.
I can only conclude that as his biggest critic, McGuinty's more intelligent handlers arranged a virus to grapple with the Lair's computer. The fools underestimate me, however. You'll need to wake up a little earlier that these types to be a step ahead of me (say, 11:49 a.m. aught to about do it).
Fortunately, what with me funnelling all this info to the people of Ontario and all, we can expect another two majorities for McGuinty, unless he starts fulfilling promises.
...
So, I guess that is it for me, for now... I have to log off before the Men in Black trace this broadcast to my current location and show up with cattle prods and some of those new electric bullets the U.S. army is messing with (we all know they prefer nonlethal force, right?). So, until I wake up in Guatanamo Bay,
Ciao, from
The Ubiquitous Lexiphage.
Sorry for not posting for so long; apparently the new blogger and my computer do not mix, so I am posting this outside of the Lair until I figure out what to do next. Before I move on, however, let me say that I was, in fact, right to fear change and therefore will continue to do so.
...
The Smurfs are doing well, Gavin is talking even more and enjoys wearing his leather jacket and sneakers in the warmer weather. Mya is talking sporatically, saying things like "Hungry", "No", and "Hi Dad". Mainly still screaming, though. This coming September Mya should be joining Juniour Kindergarten just as Gavin moves on up to Senior Kindergarten (from what I understand this involves old people wearing diapers and eating pureed food, so I'm not sure why Gav needs to be there... but, I digress...). Both are recovering from ear infections, and what stress they suffer as a result they feel comfortable in relieving with methods involving aiming at my head.
...
Against all probability the Neighbour Lady and myself continue to remain not only on speaking terms, but actually as touchy-feely as ever. This flies in the face of conventional thinking, which suggests the only romantic relationship I am qualified for involves cash up front.
...
The Insane Ex is once again in the hospital after showing up at my door in defiance of court order under the impression she was going to move in or something. Being fond of sleeping without one eye open, I politely refused and arranged an exchange of ideas between her and the police.
...
McGuinty is up to his usual tricks, his sneaky budgets openly allocating budgets towards the treatment of Autistic children whilst covertly scooping the same funds into the Liberal election coffers. Don't worry, though- despite the fact that there are laws preventing this sort of thing, it isn't really illegal because the government is doing it. An update on the waiting list for IBI therapy- when the liberals took office there was a wait list of 78 children for this program... Since then, despite McGuinty's followers pretending to throw money at the problem, the same list numbers over 1000. That's right, 1000. I'm not making this up, people.
I can only conclude that as his biggest critic, McGuinty's more intelligent handlers arranged a virus to grapple with the Lair's computer. The fools underestimate me, however. You'll need to wake up a little earlier that these types to be a step ahead of me (say, 11:49 a.m. aught to about do it).
Fortunately, what with me funnelling all this info to the people of Ontario and all, we can expect another two majorities for McGuinty, unless he starts fulfilling promises.
...
So, I guess that is it for me, for now... I have to log off before the Men in Black trace this broadcast to my current location and show up with cattle prods and some of those new electric bullets the U.S. army is messing with (we all know they prefer nonlethal force, right?). So, until I wake up in Guatanamo Bay,
Ciao, from
The Ubiquitous Lexiphage.
posted by The Lexiphage at 11:42 a.m.
1 Comments:
Glad to see you back ... I've missed your rants!
Over 1000 .... unbefreakinglievable!
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